i don't have a lot of details, but i figured i would update with what i know... my parents got a call from my dad's doctor and the tumor is malignant. they have an appointment on wed. to talk with the doctor and go over all of his options.
i am so sad...
Monday, March 1, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
hurting
it's been 2 months since my m/c and i am still hurting... it's not like i cry everyday, and can't function with society. but i am hurting inside.
i should be 19 weeks pregnant. i should be able to know my baby's gender if i want to. i should be talking about baby names with my husband and hoping that he will finally let me use the name Reid.
i know i am not the first person to have a m/c, i know i am not the last... everyone deals with it so different. in my everyday life, you would never know. i don't talk about it often, not even to my husband. just every once in a while i get sad when i think about where i should be.
i think i also had high expectations that i would be able to get pregnant again quickly. everyone told me their success stories, and how they got pregnant again the cycle after their m/c, and how fertile i would be.
oh, and i got a bill from pathology in the mail last week. one of the doctor's did mention that they could/would test the fetus to see if they could find a reason for the m/c. i didn't really think anything of it until i got that bill. now i am wondering if i want to call and see if they got any results. is it worth it? does it matter? it is what it is, and i can't change it.
lots going on in my brain tonight...
update:
*** i called today and talked to a nurse... she looked in my file and said that she couldn't find that any chromosomal testing was done. i feel better that i asked, and am ok that i don't have an answer. ***
i should be 19 weeks pregnant. i should be able to know my baby's gender if i want to. i should be talking about baby names with my husband and hoping that he will finally let me use the name Reid.
i know i am not the first person to have a m/c, i know i am not the last... everyone deals with it so different. in my everyday life, you would never know. i don't talk about it often, not even to my husband. just every once in a while i get sad when i think about where i should be.
i think i also had high expectations that i would be able to get pregnant again quickly. everyone told me their success stories, and how they got pregnant again the cycle after their m/c, and how fertile i would be.
oh, and i got a bill from pathology in the mail last week. one of the doctor's did mention that they could/would test the fetus to see if they could find a reason for the m/c. i didn't really think anything of it until i got that bill. now i am wondering if i want to call and see if they got any results. is it worth it? does it matter? it is what it is, and i can't change it.
lots going on in my brain tonight...
update:
*** i called today and talked to a nurse... she looked in my file and said that she couldn't find that any chromosomal testing was done. i feel better that i asked, and am ok that i don't have an answer. ***
Monday, February 22, 2010
Sunday, February 14, 2010
25 hours
craig and i just enjoyed 25 hours (not that we were counting) without our beautiful children. we dropped them off at my parents house yesterday at around 12:30, and got them all settled, and by 1:00 we were ready to go.
we went to grab a quick lunch at one of our favorite places near their house and then headed home. craig went for a run, while i enjoyed a nap. we then got ready and went to the movies. we saw The Blind Side and it was so good!!!! then we headed to the CBS scene for some drinks and appetizers.
today i got to sleep in, enjoyed a trip to target without and children asking me to buy them toys, icees, and snacks. we were back at my parents house at 2:00 to pick up the kids. they were all so excited to see us.
today is valentine's day and we didn't exchange gifts, we didn't even do cards this year. we were able to just enjoy each other.
it is amazing how re-energized (is that a word?) i feel after 25 hours. i am ready to tackle vacation week now...
we went to grab a quick lunch at one of our favorite places near their house and then headed home. craig went for a run, while i enjoyed a nap. we then got ready and went to the movies. we saw The Blind Side and it was so good!!!! then we headed to the CBS scene for some drinks and appetizers.
today i got to sleep in, enjoyed a trip to target without and children asking me to buy them toys, icees, and snacks. we were back at my parents house at 2:00 to pick up the kids. they were all so excited to see us.
today is valentine's day and we didn't exchange gifts, we didn't even do cards this year. we were able to just enjoy each other.
it is amazing how re-energized (is that a word?) i feel after 25 hours. i am ready to tackle vacation week now...
Friday, February 12, 2010
14 months old
3rd post in one day... am i on a roll or what? i love fridays! we have no plans, no school (for mason), no speech, etc. it is our catch up day and i love it!!!
anyways, miss hadley is 14 months old now. boy, the time sure does go by fast!!!! she really has become quite the little toddler. she walks/runs around the house. she has opinions now on what she likes and dislikes. she does a good job at getting her point across. she is so so funny, and loves to make her brothers laugh. she is still a daddy's girl, and runs to see craig every night when he gets home. she is just perfect!!!! i am really enjoying this age. and so far, she stays out of trouble. she has no interest in the stairs, or getting into too much. i am keeping my fingers crossed she stays mellow...
anyways, miss hadley is 14 months old now. boy, the time sure does go by fast!!!! she really has become quite the little toddler. she walks/runs around the house. she has opinions now on what she likes and dislikes. she does a good job at getting her point across. she is so so funny, and loves to make her brothers laugh. she is still a daddy's girl, and runs to see craig every night when he gets home. she is just perfect!!!! i am really enjoying this age. and so far, she stays out of trouble. she has no interest in the stairs, or getting into too much. i am keeping my fingers crossed she stays mellow...
does she have my eyes?
the boys both had blue eyes as babies, but by 18 months the blue changed to gray, and then to green. hadley was born with the same blue eyes as her brothers, and i was really hoping at least one of my kids would have my eyes.
here are hadley's eyes at 14 months... i think there might be a good chance that they stay. let's see what happens between now and 18 months, but for now, i would say she has my eyes. (and pretty much every stranger we meet out and about stops me to tell me the same thing.)
here are hadley's eyes at 14 months... i think there might be a good chance that they stay. let's see what happens between now and 18 months, but for now, i would say she has my eyes. (and pretty much every stranger we meet out and about stops me to tell me the same thing.)
Thursday, February 11, 2010
TGIF
last night i was feeding the kids their dinner and it was a rare night of no fights!!!! i have been so proud of carter lately... no meltdowns at the dinner table. he even asked to try an orange and grapes this week. he tried them, and didn't hate them, so that is a step in the right direction. he even had a bite of a hot dog without gagging. now i know hot dogs are not exactly healthy but it is more that fact he usually won't even try anything new.
when i know i am going to make something for dinner that the kids don't exactly love, i just put some things on their plate that i know they will eat so they won't be hungry. most nights i cut up some apples, or give them string cheese along with what i make.
i really am trying to make sure that dinner time is not a stressful time. because when it is, it sucks!!! i hate ending a good day with a fight over food. now i simply say, it is my job to make you food, and it is your job to eat it. as long as i do my part i am ok. carter is the only one who has big attitude over meal time. he eats a good breakfast and lunch everyday, so i am not worried if he refuses to eat dinner here and there.
last night when i was feeding the kids, carter asked me if they fixed Haiti yet... i told him that it is going to take a long time to fix everything. he then asked if we can have some families stay with us while they wait for a new house. i was very proud of him to think like that. he then said they can sleep on the pull-out couch, because he doesn't want mason sleeping in his room... yup, that sounds like my 6 year old!
feb. 9th was the 100th day of school, so here are pictures of carter's hat he made, and our 100th day project we made at home.
here is a picture of mason from target this week.. i let him pick out a new toy (which i never really do) and he was just thrilled. usually craig is the one who buys fun stuff for the boys and i am the one who says no all the time. it felt nice to say yes, and see the joy on his face.
i am glad today is friday and the week is over... we had a good week, and today at 2:30 when school gets out, february vacation will begin. tomorrow the boys have a dentist appointment, and then all 3 kids are going to my parents for a sleepover... the last time i had a night off from all 3 of them was in august. craig and i still don't know what we are doing, but we really don't care. i'm sure we will figure it out. i am hoping next week will be fun and we can keep busy, and make sure everyone is happy! (hey, a girl can dream!)
here's a pic of hadley from the superbowl... she was so funny, and kept looking upside down through her legs.
when i know i am going to make something for dinner that the kids don't exactly love, i just put some things on their plate that i know they will eat so they won't be hungry. most nights i cut up some apples, or give them string cheese along with what i make.
i really am trying to make sure that dinner time is not a stressful time. because when it is, it sucks!!! i hate ending a good day with a fight over food. now i simply say, it is my job to make you food, and it is your job to eat it. as long as i do my part i am ok. carter is the only one who has big attitude over meal time. he eats a good breakfast and lunch everyday, so i am not worried if he refuses to eat dinner here and there.
last night when i was feeding the kids, carter asked me if they fixed Haiti yet... i told him that it is going to take a long time to fix everything. he then asked if we can have some families stay with us while they wait for a new house. i was very proud of him to think like that. he then said they can sleep on the pull-out couch, because he doesn't want mason sleeping in his room... yup, that sounds like my 6 year old!
feb. 9th was the 100th day of school, so here are pictures of carter's hat he made, and our 100th day project we made at home.
here is a picture of mason from target this week.. i let him pick out a new toy (which i never really do) and he was just thrilled. usually craig is the one who buys fun stuff for the boys and i am the one who says no all the time. it felt nice to say yes, and see the joy on his face.
i am glad today is friday and the week is over... we had a good week, and today at 2:30 when school gets out, february vacation will begin. tomorrow the boys have a dentist appointment, and then all 3 kids are going to my parents for a sleepover... the last time i had a night off from all 3 of them was in august. craig and i still don't know what we are doing, but we really don't care. i'm sure we will figure it out. i am hoping next week will be fun and we can keep busy, and make sure everyone is happy! (hey, a girl can dream!)
here's a pic of hadley from the superbowl... she was so funny, and kept looking upside down through her legs.
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