why me? why us?

it's hard not to have some "why me?" moments when you are dealing with a difficult situation. i try not to let it get me down too much, but it still sucks.

my parents met with my dad's doctor today. the doctor wants to be very aggressive when treating the cancer, especially since he already had it 5 years ago. i remember the meeting with the doctor back then and her exact quote was "when the cancer returns, not if..."

so, they are going to do radiation/chemotherapy for 5 weeks, then give his body a break for 5-6 weeks and then surgery. we were really hoping they would just cut the tumor out, but it looks like the doctor wants to take out his whole colon and give him a colostomy. obviously, nobody would want that, but if it keeps him alive and we don't have to worry about it coming back again, then i guess we will have to deal with it. well, i won't have to deal with it, but he will, and we will support him and do what we can to help him.

have i mentioned how much i think this sucks?

i love my parents so much. they are great parents, amazing grandparents and i think craig would say they are really good in-laws. (right craig?) it just breaks my heart to see them deal with this. my dad is scared, and my mom gets very anxious. and there is nothing i can do to make things better.

ironically march is colorectal cancer awareness months, so please make sure your loved ones get a colonoscopy if they need one. my dad found out he had colon cancer at age 50 when he got his first colonoscopy.